The Fifes!

Big Step... online photo class! :)

2012-01-23T20:56:00.001-06:00

Whew! After months and months, it's finally paying off. I have started my first Online Photo Class today!!

Students will watch videos each week, with homework assignments, and post homework to get feedback, and able to ask questions. After having taught in person for years, this has been an entirely different experience. But I'm thoroughly enjoying it so far, and enjoying my students.

With going online, i'm able to reach people miles and miles away across the country, and it's awesome. If you or anyone you know is interested in taking the class, let me know. Once this pilot class is completed, and I've made any needed changes, this class will be open to the public! :)

I can't believe all the balls I'm struggling to juggle, but it's nice to see some falling into their places.

Yay for big steps! :)

Happy Monday everyone!

Goodbye 2011.

2011-12-31T21:36:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year!

This fall season has been one of the greatest growing experiences-- taking on all shooting/teaching/mothering while my dear husband fully dedicated himself to his phd. Most wives have their husbands gone from 8-5 or later, but for me this was a BIG adjustment. Coordinating the kids around client meetings/shoots was like spinning 10 plates.

I have been overwhelmed with blessings of being busy with clients and students this fall: Shoots, album designs, client correspondence, bookkeeping, taxes, teaching classes, designing brand new classes and classroom media, print sales, website/blog management, marketing, weddings, consultations, packaging, archiving and file backup, equipment maintenance.... the list goes on and on. I do enjoy each small project, but I find that i was so busy taking care of the little details, i couldn't conceptualize how to move my business forward. All my resources have been used up in small things.

I wish i had been more diligent sharing all my amazing experiences with you, but i will just have to resolve to do better next year.

My Favorite Quote of the year, encompasses all i feel:

How much luckier we are—

and how much more happiness we experience—

if we can fall in love with the life we’re living.

--Adair Lara

I think the change happened when i listened to my heart and what i truly brings me greatest joys. Here are the monuments of my 2011.

Favorites of 2011

I am visual, and i never could find links i would email to myself. I can store fun ideas to do with my kids, quotes, and inspiring images. Follow me here.

Focus Discovery: Custom Newborn Portraiture.

i am just entranced by newborn images, and the poses... oh, it makes me so happy. And i feel so grateful to feel completely at home with newborn photography.
my work will be featured in a doctors office here in Norman, OK.... I'm so grateful.

I finally have a hobby again!

I used to have so many hobbies when i was young: roller skating, reading, .... All i do is feed/care for kids and photography. It's refreshing to have a different creative outlet: Learning to crochet for newborn props... headbands, etc. So fun!

Sole Ownership of the biz.

Already mentioned... with the hubby gone ALL day, and sometimes till 9pm, i had to find sitters for all my shoots/appts/editing. But i've found i'm a better mother by separating. When i'm with my kids I'm WITH them, physically and mentally. I've been blessed with 3 ladies especially who care soooo well for my babes. I could not do this without them.

Truly happy when i serve.

focusing on others, their needs, makes me so happy. Forget my worries/stresses and find ways to make family/friends/clients happy.

I procrastinated this post for a whole month... just overwhelmed at the thought of trying to choose favorites of 2011, or even one from every wedding and portait i've shot this year. THAT was quite a daunting task. So rather than not do anything because it's not perfect, i just chose some recent images i've posted to facebook. In no particular order, and definitely not all-inclusive.... here are some images of people i've had the privilege of playing with this year.

And i stumbled on this beautiful video that i hope will make you happy as well...

to all of you, have a blessed New Years day.

Till next time... love, amber.

Deckin out in Crimson and Cream...

2011-11-28T22:41:00.002-06:00

Here is proof i see my family a LITTLE despite the crazy blessings of being busy with business....

Amidst the craziness of gillions of photoshoots in the past few months, (which i have yet to blog about!!), we hosted my husband's parents and sister Shawnie for Thanksgiving, all the way from Washington State. I have loved having her around for the past few days. As a late birthday present, we went and shots some pictures, especially dressed in her new OU gear.

We love you Shawnie!

Storm

2011-11-09T21:15:00.000-06:00

Back in May we had some terrible storms...

Our office.... we were holding class, and were in the center of a micro burst or something. Taco bell's roof was across the street, and the street was closed for a week.

Power was out all over town (including our studio), but luckily ours stayed on at home. On my way home that night.... this beautiful tree in a neighbor's yard had to be cut down. :(

Kind of ironic, that Monday here in Oklahoma we had: Earthquake, tornadoes, flood watch, thunder and lightning all in ONE day. Craaaaaazy. But we're safe and doing fine.

Made it and Love it

2011-11-08T21:11:00.001-06:00

I've been reading a great book, the Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, and have tried to have an artist's date each week. This was from a few months ago that i never published... but check out this adorable bag my friend Lisa helped me make in one afternoon! Adorable pattern-- i loved my friend Meghan's so much, and now i have one! :) :)

Aero-planes and superheros

2011-10-10T11:25:00.000-05:00

Who knew old bath towels and $1 styrofoam airplane could be SO MUCH FUN. :) All three of us had fun flying around the house. We are an unstoppable team.

Pretty Princesses

2011-10-09T14:29:00.000-05:00

These darling girls got to stay with us back in June, and looked lovely as flower girls. Love you Rebecca!

Sleepy Time

2011-10-07T14:28:00.001-05:00

We loved having uncle michael here this summer... my boys wanted to spend every minute with him. I came in and saw this.... :) :)

The big 30

2011-08-28T18:06:00.000-05:00

What better way to celebrate getting OLD than with your family, huh? Well... that and i couldn't decide until days before whether i wanted to TELL anyone. Then i regretted not planning something cool. So a few girls and i had a July birthday party the next week with 3 of us having birthdays. :) My boys got me just what i wanted... some pretty necklaces from the dollar jewelry store (that ROCKS), and the girls got an ice cream cake the next week. Life is good.

Swing Time

2011-08-27T21:01:00.000-05:00

Just my boys having fun despite the HOT Oklahoma weather this summer. And yes, sometimes i get lazy and don't snap my kids clothes completely. ;) I love having pictures by the same thing-- corban was ethan's age when we started taking pictures of this swing set. :)

Good Big brother

2011-08-01T12:51:00.000-05:00

When we came home from the hospital last fall, Ethan was still learning how to sit up again. So we'd sit him in a laundry basket, and Corb decided to entertain him with more and more toys. It was sweet to see him loving his brother.

Gymnastics Last

2011-07-21T10:49:00.000-05:00

I think what i enjoyed most was seeing how he interacts with other adults and kids. He loved to try to be chosen first, and he was loving with a little boy. I'm glad he isn't as fiesty as he was a year or 2 ago. :) Maybe there's hope for this cute boy.

Gymnastics 3

2011-07-20T10:48:00.000-05:00

Corb got to spend a little time with Kate at the opening of the last class...

we had a terrible storm here that closed the school for one day. We'll get to make that up later in the school year. :)

Gymnastics Camp more

2011-07-19T15:12:00.000-05:00

Gymnastics Camp

2011-07-18T19:11:00.002-05:00

Corban's FIRST organized activity last month (if you don't count church activities)...

...gymnastics camp.

I have cherished pictures of me with my diaper sticking out my leotard as a 2 year old. ;) There are 4 posts... i took lots of pictures. ;) He got to take it with his favorite playmate... Kate.

My aunt Roxanne and uncle Mike were in Tulsa for a wedding, and drove over to spend the afternoon with us. It was fun to have them come along to see Corban. Ethan LOVED uncle Mike. Unlike i've seen him take to a stranger before. Pretty cool. i ALMOST sent him with them on the plane. He's free to fly still, so why not? ;)

Caught...

2011-07-15T14:07:00.000-05:00

I'm not the only sweet tooth in this town anymore...

this one's less than 4 feet high and knows how to wield a knife

... sort of.

Balloon Dancing

2011-07-07T12:45:00.000-05:00

I have 3 computers, all of which are FULL. Trying to go through folders, i have come across some great stuff. :) :) Here's some fun Corb had with his playmate Sariah. They have talked about it ever since. :)

we will miss you when you move... thanks for being a good friend! Corb will miss you in his class at school in the fall.

Dear Second Child...

2011-07-05T23:13:00.000-05:00

...I promise i love you, even though i don't have as many photos of you. I hold you more and make you laugh. And i keep you and brother from killing each other on a daily+ basis. You'll thank me later for helping you survive. And every now and then i coerce daddy to come take a picture of us. i love you so much. Thank you for your big eyes and curls and curiosity, and hugs and kisses.

I love you, Mommy

My husband the magician

2011-07-05T22:06:00.002-05:00

Dustin has taken up building, and lately refinishing. :) Here's one of his latest projects, redone with a modern vintage look. :) Isn't he talented? He'll finally be starting to make money to support his obsessions... lol.

Before:

and after:

More pirate pictures...

2011-07-03T23:34:00.000-05:00

The boys spent almost an hour playing together-- world record. (They did cry/complain/ask for things every 15 minutes or less, but it was a great moment in my mothering. Forced playtime) I finally joined them because they were just too cute, and the lighting was so nice. I think the highlight of it all was baby learning to say "Rrrrr" it sounded more like a purr than a menacing warning.

i think playtime is more fun with cameras involved... means i can remember it better later on. :)

Adventures...

2011-07-02T23:23:00.003-05:00

i found buried treasure today.... what did you do?

(best $2 spent ever... the clearance rack the week after halloween... thanks to Meghan for the heads up!!)

Make time for things that matter most.

2011-06-17T09:09:00.001-05:00

One of my favorite talks, put into this short video, well done.

Piano Men

2011-06-10T09:09:00.000-05:00

The boy's new toothbrushes light up when you've been brushing long enough. I just notice one's bottom is bit through and no longer lights. In fact there's some rusty-looking somethin going on from spit and batteries. So i have to throw out that perfectly good toothbrush in favor of avoiding tetnus problems...

Anyways, here are the boys, playing on the piano together. They love the beats, but i've seen them want to play more when i have played a handful of times recently. Maybe i should brush on that habit, eh?

My son the painter

2011-06-06T11:32:00.000-05:00

This kid has taken a liking to coloring, and recently tried his hand again at painting. It's harder to stay in the lines with a brush than with a crayon or colored pencil. But i gave him blank paper, and this is what he came up with on his own. I'm pretty proud of him. :) It's Thomas, percy and james, for the non-train-educated.

Silliness

2011-06-03T11:33:00.000-05:00

i have no idea where he gets his silliness from...

Home Safe and Sound soon...

2011-06-01T10:17:00.000-05:00

i'll be thrilled to get this kid home safe... the boys have been with Dustin in WA for a whole WEEK to give me time to catch up on business. After slipping in a water park, both dustin and ethan were ambulanced to the ER, but both are doing fine. If they survive the plane again, i'll be seeing them TODAY!!! It's been a little quiet around here... i think i'm finally ready to have them back! ;)

I love my boys!

I am so lucky...

2011-05-29T21:33:00.003-05:00

...to be married to such an amazing man. :)

(we set the camera on some deck thing for this dinner cruise and put it on timer... it turned out better than ALL the pictures we asked other passengers to take of us. You'd think if pushing the shutter was all you'd have to do.... but nope. :)

Happy Mother's Day

2011-05-08T09:57:00.000-05:00

Whether you're a mom of 5, just one, or single, we are all part of a womanhood. We have in our nature to nurture and love. Thank you for all the goodness in your heart. Tell the women in your life that you are grateful for them. Happy Mother's Day.

Happy Easter and happy birthday!

2011-04-24T21:49:00.001-05:00

This little man turned 4 today! I can't believe how fast time flies. I have MANY pictures... but i'll be posting when i can be on a fast computer again... :)

Happy Easter

2011-04-23T23:13:00.002-05:00

What's in YOUR easter basket this year?

This little man was so adorable during his session this week. He was so snuggly with me!! I tried to convince her to swap her my 19 month old, but for some reason she wasn't interested.

Thank you to all our wonderful friends and family and clients and students. We love you all, and are so grateful for you. Thank you. God loves us.

love, the fifes.

Cousin time!!!

2011-04-09T23:00:00.004-05:00

My dear cousin Jared is in our temple district, although he lives in... arkansas? It's late, but i'm pretty sure that's where. Forgive me if i'm wrong, Jared!

I met Jared my freshman year at BYU, with no clue that we were related. He's my second cousin once removed. Same age. Pretty crazy. Jared is one of the happiest people i know, and has been a ray of sunshine since i met him, especially when i was leaving to serve a mission for our church.

We finally were able to connect after about 7 years. He had married Heidi, a dancing friend of mine (though i had NOTHING to do with it!!!) and moved away from BYU. They now have 2 adorable daughters, with another on the way. So glad we got to see you guys!! Thank you for making time to come see us!

The light was so pretty on their oldest, i had to grab the camera.

Glad to know Corb's not the only one who likes to make silly faces! :)

With each of our 2 kids... who knew where we'd be all these years later?

Thanks again for being so great you guys. :) hugs and love.

From the mouths of babes

2011-03-27T22:20:00.007-05:00

On the way to church, protestations from my almost-4 year old... We reviewed about the bread and water. "But I’m not thirsty," he insisted. No, we take it to remember Jesus. This repeated 2 or 3 times, before he suddenly insisted, “But Mom, I’m not thirsty for Jesus.”

and tonight, "mommy i love this toilet."
as well as "mommy, i need glue because i have to go to bed now."

Nothing that makes sense, just strange sometimes.
I'm trying to be better about writing these things down. :)

Happy Friday!

2011-03-18T17:21:00.000-05:00

I hope you're all excited it's Friday!

We broke out the kiddie pool... And the kiddos were freezing!!! But they enjoyed every minute of it. :)

What are you all up to for the weekend??

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3-14

2011-03-14T22:39:00.001-05:00

Oh, and happy pi day!! wanna hear what pi sounds like??

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BlogPress

2011-03-14T22:11:00.001-05:00

I have just discovered an amazing little app that I think will change my life forever... I'll make a full post about it once I've played around a bit. And you will be so happy!!! :) :)

(my handsome brother holding one of his sweet baby twins, when I was out in CO to photograph them 2 weeks ago. I think she's already got him wrapped around her finger.)

Good night, my friends! Thanks for stopping by!

Hot date...

2011-03-14T21:57:00.001-05:00

At 3 in the afternoon. ;) Finally got to see Harry Potter in the dollar theater. :) :) Forgot how long it's been since we went on a date! Where do you all like to go on dates??

Lunch at taco cabana was great... $3 snack for me, full late lunch for my honey.

Yummy red and normal chips... And a salsa bar. My fav is the tan-colored one. :)

Forgot to snap one at the movie. :)
Gotta squeeze these dates in!

With all these "spring break" tendencies, we have to remember to make it to teach photo classes this week! :p

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I cannot cut....

2011-03-01T22:51:00.006-06:00

... but i finally did. No pics yet. :)

V-day

2011-03-01T22:41:00.003-06:00

Dustin thinks we don't need pictures of the two of us... "we have plenty", but i finally convinced him to snap a couple with me before we went off to the stake valentine's day dance. I got my darling sister to take these. :)

This is "okay, honey. That's enough picture-taking."

Just one more nice one?

Pleease?

okay... we'll be done. :P

But i got some in the process. Maybe we'll have to get someone to take our pictures for real sometime... we'll see.

Pretty lil Sis

2011-03-01T22:38:00.004-06:00

My darling little sister came for valentine's weekend, and got to go to her first church dance. Not only that, but it was at the State Capitol, a formal dance! I didn't think she'd fit my dress, but it was perfect, and she looked amazing. Check out her hair too! :) :) Pretty lady.

Art for the Playroom

2011-02-13T16:43:00.000-06:00

It's been at least 5 years since i painted anything... once photography took over my life, i haven't done much with my art major since. Dustin made me an art table, but i wasn't using it! The problem was i had no direction. So he gave me an assignment: 3 pieces of art for the boys room, to go as a set, on matching blue backgrounds. Nemo, Thomas and McQueen. He even picked out the images for me to use as reference.

So let me introduce you to my lovely art table. You can see my awesome bookcase he made me in the background. And my wonderful drafting chair. :) :) Just like my mommy now!!

Used some 2 year old primer from the garage to start with on the wood. Dustin cut me some mdf boards 12x12 inches.

Corb was absolutely thrilled for the project. He loved watching me, but he could only be tall enough to see if he was behind me on my art chair. Luckily for the blue it was loose enough strokes to not show his bumps!

It was only when i got to the eyes that i discovered some other fine-tip brushes i could use, so then i took more time to be careful. I haven't taken a picture of the final product... a few last tweaks i want to make.

But in the meantime, i've started on the next one... Thomas the Train!

Aunt Aria is here!

2011-02-12T17:40:00.002-06:00

The boys are having a blast with their aunt here. With her being 16 years younger than me, we don't get to hang out too often. So I am enjoying some sister time together! She has some great art skills. Corban helped her make fish for her boat. :)

Dustin's New Hobby: Home Improvement

2011-02-04T18:28:00.004-06:00

For those of you who haven't seen any of Dustin's creations, i'll save that for another post... for the blizzard i brought the niiiice computer home from the studio, and i get to go through all kinds of photos. :)

For now, here's our latest project.... the playroom.

The boys are doing okay sharing a bedroom, so far.

Previous owners did this cute runner around the room, and curtains to match. Unfortunately, i thought it was only contact paper, but it was wallpaper i think. Whatever it was, it was a bear to get off the textured walls.

And on to painting!

The boys are very excited for the new room....

Now he's on to building a wall shelving unit... :) Can't keep a man away from his power tools. :) This room should be super fun when it's all done.

Room for 2?

2011-02-02T11:59:00.002-06:00

How many of you had your kids share rooms? What age did you start? First night went alright. Here's night #2....

Blizzard Blizzard!

2011-02-01T15:26:00.003-06:00

There have been times in the past when warnings for a "big" storm haven't panned out. But i didn't want to take a chance. I ended up with both boys in a very crowded grocery store, hours before the storm was predicted to hit. Here's what i found in the bread aisle:

The rest of the store was similar. It was hard not to feel panicked heading home, but as long as we have electricity and internet we'll be just fine. :)

Those of you not affected by this storm yet, go check out weather.com videos and articles... most of the states, over 100 million people will be affected by this storm!

While we are snowed in and getting 3 foot drifts, Dustin has built and stained a new bed for Corban, and i am now getting a peek at Christmas family photos!!! It's about time i start editing. I have no choice, with no room left on my computer, i have to process these raw files!

But i will have a lot of fun in the process. :)

Bringing in the new year...

2010-12-31T19:17:00.003-06:00

Much to catch up on, but the longest 2 days are over with success: welcoming the newest addition to our family!

Pre-owned and paid in full, Crysler Town and Country Touring 2005 excellent condition, with all stow 'n go seats (for Dustin's Home Depot obsession) and dual air control up front. Sad that second place minivan had DVD and steering wheel controls for the audio... but this one will treat us well, and we are happy to have it.

I have Dave Ramsey to thank for my continued efforts to NEVER have car payments. If you're new to his philosophies on cars, check this video out.

**addition**

We had an awesome friend Cliffton come along with us-- he's worked on cars most of his life, and worked at a dealership fixing cars before. His knowledge blows my mind-- i just don't really do cars.

Aaaand a special thanks to the biggest nerd in my life: Dustin. He made a statistical model to help us choose the best cars. First he bought a data-scraping tool that pulls the information from websites about local cars. That info goes into a model that spits out which cars are "screamin' deals," priced well below where expected. You also can see which dealerships are consistently pricing their cars well above expected values. So we only had to check out 5 minivans that were good deals. The one we got actually hadn't been listed yet, but he plugged in, and talked them down to $2000 less than the model predicted it should be.

Thanks, honey!!! :) :)

Social savvy Christmas

2010-12-28T19:32:00.001-06:00

I meant to post this sooner... but those of you with social media will get a kick out of this. ... :)

70 degree weather + free admission = fun.

2010-12-20T22:36:00.002-06:00

We had amazing weather today, and free admission at the zoo, so Jen and i ventured out together with our 3 kiddos in her car... I love it, and enjoyed taking some pictures... enjoy! :)

Corban spent the last 15 minutes watching the seal swim and come up for air over and over again. I loved seeing him, enjoying "playing" with the seal.

ABC train

2010-12-19T23:35:00.000-06:00

After the first few letters, it was more exciting to place them than to really learn them, but at least he was repeating them with me. :)

My climber

2010-12-16T11:33:00.000-06:00

I often come around the corner to find this little guy standing on benches, upside down laundry baskets, and anything he can find. He's just too cute, and he's starting to be aware to not just fall off. I'm liking this!

Christmas x2

2010-12-12T23:09:00.000-06:00

We put up our $7 Christmas tree (bought after christmas on SALE!!) at the photography studio and it was just magical for Corban. Unfortunately, when it was time to go home, he was devastated he the tree wasn't coming too.

So yes, we are now the owners of 2 Christmas trees. I let him choose the second, and it has colored lights. Pictures to come.

The second was full price. That makes 2 for almost half off, right??

Ready for takeoff

2010-12-11T20:48:00.000-06:00

These curls are just going crazy. Ethan's wings are about ready for lift-off, but i can't bear to cut them!

Playdates

2010-12-10T23:38:00.000-06:00

I am so grateful to some awesome women in my life who swap babysitting with me. Our boys get to learn social skills and it means i can be more a part of their life than if i sent them off to a daycare. Thank you, Meghan, Maren and Tracy (and Hannah too!) and everyone else who steps in as it works out. Now that we have an intern again, maybe my life will get back in balance. (probably not. ;P)

Face Paints :: First Time

2010-12-08T20:51:00.002-06:00

First time we broke out the face paints (after about 1001 requests from a certain 3 year old), it was magical. Corban requested a red car and a star. Then he wanted to paint my face. So of course we had to take pictures. Baby got a rudolph nose, just for fun. :) He is my little climber, so he's standing on the lidded-garbage can next to the sink.

Facepaints

2010-12-06T21:47:00.002-06:00

Who said face paints were just for fairs and parties? :) We've done them a few times since scoring Halloween face paint for practically nothing. Very happy about that.

Corban's loving Care Bears lately, and drew an awesome rainbow outside with sidewalk chalk. So this was his request today. And of course watched Care Bears afterwards. :)

TODAY!

2010-11-18T23:45:00.002-06:00

I decided i don't have enough pictures of me with the kids. So today i set out to take at least one of myself. I got some adorable video that someday i'll do something with. Ethan's curls are intense enough to fly with. And he certainly is a climber. Now, if only he'd get some coordination to help getting down from where he climbs. *sigh*

Here i am in all my glory, un-showered. 1 wedding album designed with 3 to go, 3 shoots to edit, 7 hours of intern interviewing down with 3 to go, and i have rewashed the last load of laundry twice.

But i've decided to document my life, so here it is.

This is my absolute fav shot of the day.

I was feeling adventuresome, so i tried for both boys. Does hair count?

Attempt number 2. By this point Ethan had enough, and i wasn't going to risk $5k of camera to a wiggly one year old.

I want to point out that i took these TODAY and i am posting them TODAY! (i have 8 minutes until midnight)I just finished a family edit for tomorrow's ordering session, and wanted to reward myself. Photos have less calories than ice cream. Though that sounds tempting too... :P

Ethan

2010-11-17T21:33:00.000-06:00

Somebody else loves the chalkboard too, for different reasons.

He also ingests the chalk, so i've had to put it up higher. Anyone else's kids like to eat chalk?

And he loves carrying this baby doll around. So tender! :)

Potty Training

2010-11-15T21:03:00.000-06:00

Corban has been pee-potty trained for quite a while. But he just won't go #2.

When our friends were over, Dustin caught him just starting to go in his pants. In the past i've run him in to the potty at that point, and although i know there's more to come out, he just won't.

So we were so thrilled he did, we immediately got him the reward we've been talking about for weeks: Thomas the Train underwear. Yes, it was 9:15pm. Yes, he was a zombie by the time he went to bed, but he was so thrilled and we had to make it immediate. The next day he went potty #2 in the toilet again!! He immediately said, "Now i get a Percy train!!" Okay, so he makes up his own rewards. But i can deal with that. So Monday morning we went to the store to get him a train. But he didn't want any of them! Instead he bought a puzzle. He loved it, and did a great job. I love watching him concentrate. And i love his little fingers.

Don't expect him to be getting a new boat every time he's on the potty when he's 30, but for now, we're just fine to do what it takes. Desperate potty training parents will understand :)

What potty training successes have worked for you, when it really wasn't working?

Time Management for Busy Moms

2010-11-15T20:29:00.002-06:00

Ever heard the analogy of the Big Rocks of life? This post i found in my google reader was wonderful and insightful for us moms:

Time Management for Busy Moms

(picture pulled from the article)

So go now and figure out what are your big rocks? What are the little ones? What do you have to do to prioritize those big rocks. They're not going to put themselves in your jar alone. You have to DECIDE to put them in first.

So go think about it and write it down somewhere: What are your big rocks?

Outside

2010-11-13T13:42:00.000-06:00

Ethan went out on the backyard play set for one of the first times in his life (and he's 14 months old??) and discovered his love of the outdoors. Any time a door opens in our house, he's booking it for the door. I love my little man.

ABCs

2010-11-12T21:35:00.000-06:00

I scored this awesome chalkboard for $10 at Just Between Friends consignment. My friend Elizabeth Peters told me about her daughter and her love of letters and writing letters. So i decided to learn from her and start drawing dots to help him draw. He did a great job.

But he decided he wanted to color it all in... his latest passion.

And then i turned around later to see him tracing his hand-- they must do that in nursery, because i haven't done that with him before!

More coloring...

Halloween Comes late at the Fifes

2010-11-10T13:02:00.000-06:00

I've decided that i'm a bargain hunter. I love when something is priced twice what i paid for it. So when costumes are $30 for flimsy material, i can't do it. So i put it off, and we ended up without costumes this year. The boys didn't know any different. It's just so much effort! Maybe when they care more...

Genn and her boys were going to come down and carve pumpkins together and all kinds of cousin fun. But in Denver, Niko went into the ER with croup. Sadly, they turned around. Glad Uncle Michael was with them to help with the 2 younger boys! So a few days ago i bought gourds at the store even though Halloween was over. Sunday Ethan had a juicy cough and Corban was acting like he was going to throw up.

So while Ethan slept, Corban helped me clean so we could paint the pumpkins. His babysitter's family had painted Bob and Larry (veggie tales) so he wanted to do as well. I had some cheap paints, so bob is more of a bright orange than red... :P I ended up pulling out my art supplies and painter's acrylics for eyes and extras. Here are the pumpkins in progress...

What i am MOST excited about was the 90% off sale at Walmart with halloween. Seriously made my month. I'll post another time about my finds. :)

Coloring

2010-11-09T21:41:00.000-06:00

I was disappointed for a long time when Corban would hardly make a mark of any kind. As the son and grandson of an artist, i had high hopes. But looks like the artist within is becoming unleashed. He has really taken to coloring. He colors and colors and colors. He'll spend half the day coloring, and it warms my heart. Something about completing a spot or picture. He is learning about using different colors for different things-- i'd like to think it was from watching me when i color with him, but who knows. Maybe it's just intuition.

Happy birthday!

2010-11-09T11:05:00.002-06:00

Big birthday wishes to my brother Brandon... he and his wife ashton are expecting twins in January, and just got a job in Denver, CO! Brandon, from late night ice cream in the kitchen as teenagers, to harry potter and computer discussions now, i love you. Life would not be as sweet without you. Much hugs and love.

In the Cockpit

2010-10-14T10:23:00.004-05:00

It has been more than a month since I posted?! Ethan got better just in time to go on a plane with me and Corban to NY for Amanda Lim's wedding. Corban got invited into the cockpit before our flight, and had a blast. The pilot let corban push buttons and make noises, and sit in the seat. I'm amazed our flight wasn't sabotaged by Corban's eagerness. ;)

Dread seized me as i realized the seats were quickly filling up behind us as Corban was having a grand old time. Fortunately the flight attendant called to the back of the plane and got us 2 seats together.

I am soooooo grateful for wonderful people who sit next to us on the plane and are understanding. At least on our home trip. :P Going to NY passengers in front of Corban's seat both turned around and told me not-to-nicely to keep corban from kicking their seat. I have a lot to say about that another time. But on the 2 flights home, Corban got to sit next to 9 year olds on both flights. That went MUCH better.

All done Hospital!

2010-10-01T09:27:00.002-05:00

Released from the hospital and picc line out, the three of us will head to NY in an hour! Just in time to shoot Amanda Lim's wedding tomorrow... :)

Generosity

2010-09-27T22:27:00.000-05:00

We have been blessed with generosity of friends, and we've joyed at sharing that with hospital staff-- Corban walked around and offered cookies to all the nurses. They were just thrilled.

Update...

2010-09-27T09:40:00.003-05:00

Baby's coming home today!! We'll finish his IVs at home, and come back Thursday to get his pic line out. :) :)

MmmmMMMmmm

2010-09-25T22:21:00.000-05:00

Grandma Marti brought a bunch of these yummy apple chips. They are amazing!!! Dustin and i have to fight over the bag.

Dr. House

2010-09-25T10:20:00.000-05:00

I've only watched one episode of House, but it feels like we're in a TV episode when teams of doctors come in-- attending doctor, Resident, Intern, and med students. :)

Three's a Great Crowd

2010-09-24T22:25:00.000-05:00

Watching movies altogether has been the favorite pasttime of these boys...

Daddy and Baby

2010-09-24T17:24:00.001-05:00

Dustin loves to crawl in with Ethan to snuggle, even all three-- adding corban on top of Dustin.

EEG #2

2010-09-24T08:23:00.000-05:00

Although he had one done in Norman, they wanted to do another one here. Unfortunately, he didn't have an episode during the EEG. But he did well, and it looks normal. On to more blood tests...

Blanket Tag

2010-09-24T01:08:00.000-05:00

Ethan has always loved the tag on his blanket, holds gingerly, chews on it, loves to hold it. It was the one thing we could do as he was not responsive-- just place that in his hand, and his fingers would often close around it. Most of all, it made us feel like we were helping Ethan feel more comfortable. Blankies aren't just good medicine for little folks.

Transferred to Children's Hospital

2010-09-23T22:05:00.003-05:00

We got the news tuesday evening that Ethan was going to be moved to Children's Hospital-- i was at home getting photos up on the blog and things in order, emotionally dealing with things, and i was on my way back when i got the call. When i arrived, Dustin was pretty shaken. The step to send him to Children's was the final fallback plan = nothing was working. I think it was the most emotional time of the whole ordeal so far-- kind of feeling like we had to prepare to say goodbye if we had to. Tra' Chambers and Bro Bell came right away and we were able to all have blessings before moving, which restored much peace. I wanted to document the trip over, just like everything else.

We didn't get to have the lights on, or break the speed limit, but it was fun anyways. :)

We've had a number of visitors, and that's been so special.

John Chambers took this photo. :) He'll be a professional photog yet. :)

Grandma Fife arrived at midnight that night.

Updates

2010-09-22T23:15:00.002-05:00

If you want to stay most current on updates, check up with my posts on fb. I'll try to post here as often as i can.

I have a lot to say, but it's late. Currently no answers still, just more tests. Maybe tomorrow morning with the pediatric neurologists we'll find more direction.

Another miracle that i'll go into more. Ethan winces whenever anyone talks to him like he's in pain. His neck is a wet noodle with no support at all, his eyes roll and space out. But we did a video chat with Corban from home, and Dustin drove a car off Ethan's chest, and corban's laugh made ethan smile 4 times. 4 times!!! He's only done that once in almost a week. We knew Corban needed to come, and just at that time, they told us a Ronald McDonald room opened up downstairs so we drove up immediately. Ethan not only didn't wince to Corban, but reached out to touch his face. Astounding.

Here he is holding back on a hug from Corban. These are rays of hope.

Off to bed now. Good night!

Mom and Dad = hanging in there

2010-09-22T03:15:00.000-05:00

Hospitals can be beautiful places: spaces of healing and restoration.

For us right now, it is a place of... waiting. Waiting and waiting.

But i can wait for my baby. His heart is beating, and he looks around the room. He opens for food and bottle occasionally. His hand loosely tightens around my finger, and i want to WILL him to come back to us.

But one thing i have learned is that I am not control of my life. God knows us and he knows what experiences we have to have. He will teach me what i need to learn, and i will be stronger in whatever way he needs me to be. I know my baby is whole and special, and no matter what happens, he is my baby Ethan. He came from Heavenly Father to me, and i have the peace that we can be as a family together forever.

Dustin was having a hard time getting me to smile. So he said, "Look out the window, and pretend you see a clown... throwing up into a hula hoop." What?! You are so silly, honey. But it got the smile he was looking for.

I had a great few hours to gel at home with my photos from this experience. It was highly therapeutic, and i gained perspective and strength. Stepping away for a bit was exactly what i needed. I also had intentions of packing for my 6am flight.

But a call from Dustin told me they were sending Ethan up to Children's Hospital, and i've changed my flight for now. Still lots of unknowns, and waiting. But for now, Grandma Marti Fife has arrived tonight from WA, and she and Dustin will sleep peacefully.

Tests and more tests

2010-09-21T21:51:00.000-05:00

I feel blessed to have been there for so many of Ethan's tests. I seemed to be able to comfort him with my touch or humming sunday as he was poked and prodded. Now he's pretty tame/lethargic about everything. Not 5 days ago, he was an egg-beater to get a diaper on before he chased away. Hard to believe this is the same baby! The technician said he was the best baby he's ever had. He held so still. I put the little tag on his blanket in his hand to hold under the restraints and he just looked around.

Results came back well-- the CT scan didn't show anything. That's good. :)

Mommy & Baby

2010-09-21T18:42:00.000-05:00

Ethan perked up to see big brother come to visit. They do love each other. It was wonderful to see his eyes so open and alert. Too often he will just stare and not focus, or when he does, then he shuts them abruptly then rolls them.

So with the chipper boy he was being, I convinced Dustin to take some pictures of me. I love my baby. I love when there are glimpses of him returning to himself-- he even did a little sniffle thing back at Dustin, and smiled at him for the first time today.

Sweetheart Dustin

2010-09-21T15:03:00.003-05:00

The only test i haven't been there for was the EEG today. I am home packing. Dustin doesn't find the same therapy with taking photos that i do--they're more of an effort. So i was thrilled and shocked when he emailed me this from his phone today. Thank you for helping me feel a part of it honey.

P.S. My room DID get cleaned!!!!!! But... I didn't take a picture. :P

The Room

2010-09-21T14:59:00.002-05:00

The hospital beds they have for babies look like they came from the 50s. But they do their job, and Ethan's not moving much at all. Today he pulled out his oxygen, so they decided to see how he'd do without it. They had already decreased it to a very small amount. So far he's doing a little better than before...

Photo Therapy

2010-09-21T14:03:00.003-05:00

I found my solace.

My memory is like a sieve. Unless i have something to catch the moments-- with words or pictures, it is gone forever. Pictures make the moment real. They validate and cement my emotions and thoughts of the moment.

Once i had my camera in hand, i felt i was prepared for battle. My little walking, laughing baby who charmed 5 ladies every grocery store trip, now lies still in his hospital crib. My camera is both my shield and sword. Life can funnel in through the lens, and somehow make sense in my head eventually. Until things come into focus altogether, the images are there to form the puzzle of my life. And i can look at them and remember, and marvel in the beauty of life.

So Monday morning after a long night of tests, i picked Corban up from the Petersons. We picked out movies and played trains at the library, ate a late lunch at McDonald's, and even ice cream afterwards. I laughed and gave my love and attention to Corban.

We stopped by some wild sunflowers to pick some and bring them to baby. It was so tender and sweet to see Corban hold it out to his little brother, hoping for him to grab it like he does with all the toys Corban likes to share. But instead we put it up above Ethan's head so he could "see" it.

Corban loved watching his new movie...

And daddy was busy so i tried getting a picture of me and baby by myself with my heavy camera...

Then i realized i never took a picture of my new haircut. Doesn't seem as important in perspective. But here it is, dirty.

Although life definitely does not feel normal, i want to capture it for what it is-- joy amid trials.

Sweet Baby

2010-09-21T13:41:00.002-05:00

The scariest thing for me is not knowing the end. If this was a broken leg, it would be a matter of seeing it healing. Right now, he's pretty unresponsive and unable to hold his head up. He sleeps most of the time and doesn't respond in his normal cheerful self. I don't know if/when our baby Ethan will return, or if this will be our new baby we get to love. But i am grateful for him and how easy he makes it to do all his tests.

Nurse Kimberly gave this to Ethan because he's the opposite of a crab: he's the sweetest baby. That was so nice of her. He holds it sometimes when i put it in his hand.

Sick Ethan

2010-09-21T13:23:00.004-05:00

For those of you who haven't heard, our baby who just turned 1 is in the hospital. He was sick on his birthday, so we never really celebrated. He got better, and then got sick again. This time with a diagnosis of ear infection.

Ethan was showed strange blinking/ eye-rolling that i didn't think was normal. But he was put on amoxicilin (sp?) and his fever was staying pretty high. He had high heart rate, and very high temperature. After 2 1/2 days he wasn't improving, but worsening. I was concerned, but we had many things going on. Finally today i talked to Glifford Gilson and my Aunt Julianne, both doctors, and they agreed the symptoms looked worrisome. Especially not supporting his head at all and fast heart rate.

So i brought him to the ER while Dustin stayed at home with napping Corban. Ethan was admitted and 3 tries we finally landed an iv spot. The lack of reaction showed he was really sick-- they were digging in his scalp trying to mine a vein and he was only mildly reacting. His oxygen was below 79%, and heart rate above 170. I wasn't able to fill dustin in until after the first whirlwind of tests, and there were more, so all he heard was Ethan is very sick, and on oxygen and IV. I really scared him. Luckily, we have great friends who not only took Corban from him, dropped him off to me at the hospital (reeeeeally wish we had a second car at this point!!), but sent warm yummy dinner.

With some oxygen, & fluid he finally was doing a bit better. They tried to catheter him with no success, then as they were drawing blood from the inside of his leg, he peed on them. Ha. They must not be mothers of any little boys-- just left him uncovered. ;) The spinal tap was difficult in anticipation for me-- i know how much those can hurt. But the hardest for him was being curled and pushed in a little ball. But i got to hold his head and arm and i hummed his bedtime song-- As i have loved you. I was worried i'd lose it, but at some point i realized i had to be strong for him, and i knew i could calm him in a way no one else could.

All the tests came back normal while we waited for the preliminary spinal tests. But i know something was very not normal with my son. So i wasn't very surprised when they returned and found that he has spinal meningitis, and would be admitted to pediatrics until at least Tuesday when the cultures came back-- to find out if it's bacterial or spinal.

As such a technologically-connected family we are, i can't upload the pics on my phone. :P But we eventually got a camera, and i'll be posting more shortly.

Before and.... After?

2010-09-12T22:04:00.002-05:00

I took this photo to show how terrible my master bedroom looked so i could feel better once it was clean. Then i was going to post the clean picture near the door so i could have a visual reminder what it would look like.

One problem.

There was no after picture. Yes, my friends, this was taken in MARCH. And it's now... september? We've seen various shades of cleanliness, but believe it or not, my room doesn't even look this good at the moment.

This is what i'm functioning in right now. I have 9 days until i leave for a California wedding (which i will then turn around and go to a NY wedding). I have 45 things on my business to-do list. But i resolve here, publicly on the blog, that when i leave, MY ROOM WILL BE CLEAN!!!

Now that's scary, but I'm gonna say it. And i want you to hold me accountable!! If you have my email or are friends on fb, message me happy thoughts, and with your help, i think i can do it!!!

:) happy sunday.

Brothers

2010-09-06T18:00:00.002-05:00

Corban has gotten a bit gentler than he did the first time he sat in front of a camera with his baby brother--he would squeeeeeeeeze so hard. Now he still gives lots of love, but has learned to be more gentle.... at least overall. ;)

about a week old last year...

and now a year later...

i know why moms love pictures that aren't always "technically" correct-- they still show something adorable! :)

Labor on Labor day... one year ago.

2010-09-06T17:52:00.003-05:00

This little man has been a joy to our lives, especially Dustin. Ethan adores Daddy and i now know what Dustin feels when Corban prefers me! But at his sickest and saddest moments, mommy is just the thing baby needs. It's been a wonderful year. I can hardly believe how time has flown, my little blue-eyed bundle. Thank you for being so joyful and happy. So sad for you to be sick for your birthday, but happy you seem to be getting better.

Here's my favorite from his newborn session, 5 days old. It's my desktop picture. :)

And here he is a year later. I want to say we get MAJOR brownie points for actually getting it done BEFOREhand and not waiting until a month or longer afterwards. :)

I have many more pictures to share, but i wanted to remember today here on the blog before it's gone.

On a side note, i ask: At what point are they no longer "baby"?

Our Almost-Done Party!

2010-09-05T20:36:00.002-05:00

After spending every waking moment for a whole week in our new office (ethan taking naps and going to bed in his pack and play in our office bathroom) and Corban watching movies and eating cookies and helping "sweep" (paint) and laying floor... we had home evening at our office last week to finish the baseboards.

Corban wasn't too thrilled to go back, so we made it a "party" at the office. I picked up a balloon, rootbeer, oreos, red box kids movie, we ordered pizza delivery from our favorite place, and we had a blast. He was in love with his balloon. Though it was a little difficult at times, it worked out well, and made some great family memories.

Bribery

2010-09-05T20:19:00.002-05:00

Dustin volunteered some photos as family time today, so i jumped on it. I have to say, much bribery was involved. I don't recommend having a 3-year old and 1-year old for pictures with less than 3 people. We barely survived. :P But we got cute pictures! :)

Outfits

2010-08-21T22:41:00.000-05:00

There are a few outfits that i wanted to get captured in pictures before baby got too big, so the day before our road trip, we snapped away...

Waaaaaaay too much fun

2010-08-21T00:47:00.002-05:00

Sunset dinner cruise off the coast of downtown San Diego, live outdoor concert at the harbor, and other random tidbits of fun... as well as 40+ hours driving in the car... :P we are back from our road trip!! Many many photos waiting to be edited and posted, and other exciting news on the way. (No, we're not pregnant :P )

My Dear Lanilan.

2010-08-21T00:10:00.002-05:00

Of the many people i was able to see on our marathon road trip we just returned from, was my dear freshman/sophomore roommate Lani. She is amazing and wonderful, and I'm kicking myself for not taking pictures of her beautiful house! I loved the way she clustered photos on her wall, and the way she decorated her home. And of course she has adorable kids!! *Sigh* next time I'll pull this heavy camera out and snap more. Or I'll just go buy a cooler point and shoot. ;) She as this beautiful frame of the two of us at each others' weddings. It is so special, and i love it. Thank you my friend!!! :)

Blocks & Fun

2010-08-07T22:59:00.003-05:00

So we're 1+ day away from our roadtrip, and have we started packing? Why be any different now...

But we're having a lot of fun between photoshoots and weddings. Corban is enthralled with his blocks lately, and ethan's joined in for the fun.

In other news, Ethan has now almost exclusively gone to bottle-- sad for me, but he's starting to chunk up a bit finally. And Corban is making great progress with his big boy pants!! The potty seat is coming with us in the car...

Happy Sunday!

Busiest time of our lives

2010-07-28T15:27:00.002-05:00

For those of you not into Facebook yet, you've been missing out on the action. I decided i should finally attempt a blog post of all the craziness that's been going on.

Soooo... i was in NY to shoot an outdoor theatrical production, which Dustin and i had been asked to shoot back in 2007. It is time for new visual material, so they flew me out again. With Dustin in July classes, i went solo with boys, and luckily had my parents to help with the kiddos.

I'm bummed i can't showcase all my new amazing images since they are now intellectual reserve, but you'll eventually see them on their facebook page and website. (if you click around different tabs on the menu bar you can see a more of our images from 2007)

I also got to meet some amazing people for photo sessions! First was a newborn of a good friend of mine, then triplets of a friend of my friend Jenna, then her famliy the next day! Dustin shot 2 engagement sessions here in OK while i was gone. Coming home i then 2 weddings that weekend, with 4 more sessions and a wedding this week.

So here's a sprinkling of all the shoots we have going on... we're so lucky to know so many neat people.

Missing Grandma

2010-07-27T16:32:00.002-05:00

We're back in Oklahoma, and busy busy. But we were glad to go, and Corban wore his new shirt on sunday from grandma, and she wanted to see it. :)

Goodbye NY...

2010-07-21T09:41:00.002-05:00

I'm all packed with goodies... prepared for a 6 hour layover, but hoping i don't get one!! It was a busy, but fun trip.

Over 2500 photos, 6 shoots later, we're finally leaving... but don't worry! We'll be back in October!!

Busy in NY

2010-07-16T15:12:00.002-05:00

It's been non-stop crazy fun so far... late nights of shooting the Hill Cumorah Pageant, and i'm sooooo glad grandpa is willing to sacrifice and watch the kiddos. Here's more pictures from our delayed flight layover. Never thought i could have lasted 6 hours with 2 boys in an airport. Thank goodness for the double stroller! (Great idea, Misty.)

Even with the stroller, you can imagine how much corban wanted to sit in it... So i did a lot of chasing...

This tired puppy did marvelously. It was on the plane that he was squirming in my arms... the. entire. flight.

We made it.

2010-07-13T14:44:00.001-05:00

50 minute layover turned into 6 hours... but we are safe and sound in NY!

3 days and counting

2010-07-10T00:01:00.002-05:00

We're coming, Mom!! Soon you'll be able to squeeze these adorable cheeks that i just can't get enough of.

Check out his teeth! :)

Father's Day Shoot/ late 3 year pictures

2010-07-07T10:45:00.000-05:00

Heading out the door to take pictures with an over-tired baby is really not a good idea. In case you were thinking about it. But none the less they turned out just fine. (picture overload....)

Then and now

2010-07-05T10:39:00.000-05:00

A few more ... the first one is from 2009 when ethan was just in my tummy, and the others are from 2010.